I grew up in Christian home. We did all those things that typical Christians do: went to church every week, spent time with the elderly and sick, went to mid-week service, youth group, and prayer group, participated in Christmas and Easter programs. We even had family worship, and my parents taught us all about Jesus, His sacrifice, and saving grace. I think we can all agree that many times a person or an entire family can live the life I just described and still not be a 'Christian'.
Sure, a lot of people say they are Christian because they go through the motions, abide by the rules, learn what's expected of them and do it. Reading this some people may think that's exactly what my family was doing, but they'd be wrong. See, my parents never once forced any of us kids to participate in church or religion in general. I'm sure that had any of us rebelled against it we would've been expected to at least keep the Sabbath while under their roof, but generally my parents left it up to us.
What they did might frighten some Christian parents. It may downright upset some altogether. What my parents did was teach us all they could about God at every opportunity, give us every chance we wanted or needed to experience God's love through service to others or fellowship with other Christians, and then they let us do what we wanted.
So...
Every Sabbath we were in church.
Every Wednesday we were at Pathfinders (most of us liked it so much we went on to lead out as adults).
Once a month we went to a nursing home after church to sing to the elderly.
Every fall we would collect canned goods for the needy.
Every Christmas we would sing our hearts out at the Christmas program.
And we did all this of our own volition.
It's true, we as a family were highly involved in church, but I don't think anyone ever questioned our motives--not even when we sometimes had the opportunity to just be kids.
I can definitely account for at least 6 Halloweens in my childhood that I dressed up and went Trick-or-Treating. I'm sure there were more, but I know for sure I went those years because I remember my costumes. Once I was an angel, two years I was The Little Mermaid, two years I was Pocahontas, and at least once I was a hippie. I can say with complete sincerity that my dressing up and traveling the neighborhood with droves of other young children in the spirit of fun did not diminish or damage my relationship with God in the slightest way. I will go further and say that none of those other children that I spent most days with, that saw me in the hallways at school, or played with me in our yards in evenings thought any less of me as a sincere Christian because of my participation in the activity.
My parents' three fun-loving, and church-going children didn't return home after Trick-or-Treating with a mean or evil spirit. Mostly we just shared laughs and candy.
It's not the healthiest holiday (but none are). It doesn't have the brightest story in history books. It costs money (unless you are good with a sewing machine or paper mache), and takes time.
But that is how memories are made. I have many memories from my childhood, most have to do with church trips or Pathfinder trips, family camping trips, and holidays. What I remember about Halloween is that it was a lot of fun to Trick-or-Treat with my brothers and parents and friends. It is my oldest brother's birthday, so we got to have birthday cake and Halloween candy.
I also always seem to remember a story about a little boy that my parents new from college. They were all in college for ministry, and this little boy wanted to go Trick-or-Treating, so his parents took him. He dressed like the devil complete with the red suit, pitchfork, and pointed tail. When at one house he was asked if he could do a trick for some candy he stood as straight as he could, his chest out so proud, and sang "Jesus Loves Me" in his devil outfit.
Now, my sons are still a little young for such tricks, but some that my oldest knows is how to pray, how to share, and how to love. He knows some Bible stories and truths about our Lord. The truth is that these aren't tricks at all. They are our lifestyle. Sure, every year we carve a pumpkin for our porch, we let him pick out a Halloween costume, walk door to door with a bag for candy, and he brightens faces behind every door with his smile. For now this is what Halloween is about for him. He has a lot of fun, and so do we. When we start handing out candy we may attach something to the candy to give the kids a little something meaningful, but when we don't get that stuff in our kids' bags, it doesn't upset us. Our kids learn all about God through our lifestyle. They don't unlearn it over one night of Trick-or-Treating.
So this Halloween when you open the door, one of the many Batman faces you see will be with me. I hope he and his cowboy comrade (his little brother) bring you some joy, because they sure get joy out of Trick-or-Treating.
I urge everyone to educate themselves and make your own choices regarding holidays. Where there seems to always be 'Pagan roots' to many of our beloved holidays, there are also Christian ones. To many holiday traditions are just a time to spend with family anyway, and so I say Celebrate! But please remember, if you study the history and decide not to celebrate a holiday in a certain way, be careful not to judge others who still do. It may not take away from their Christian experience in the least, and who are you to make that judgment anyway?
This website (Celebrating Holidays) is very helpful, not only to explain the Christian history of every major holiday, but also includes activities and hints to keep holidays wholesome. I encourage anyone on the fence to check it out. And if you decide to go Trick-or-Treating be SAFE and HEALTHY!
Saturday, October 27, 2012
Thursday, October 25, 2012
A Picture of God from Red
What happens when you listen to Christian music almost exclusively for a year and a half? Apparently what happens to this girl is that I go to buy a song from one of my favorite secular artists' new album and in my brain, turn it Christian. It's not a bad thing. My favorite song from Taylor Swift's new album Red, "The Last Time", can hurt if it reminds you of an old or current love, but the lyrics can be heartbreaking if it reminds you of God's love.
Maybe the lyrics speak to me in this way because I've been reading a book called Pursued by a Relentless God in which the author, Shawn Brace, explores the grace of God in a new light--or at least a light I've never explored or realized.
An interesting trend in modern spirituality seems to be an inclination toward mysticism, in which Christians are seeking God through various forms of prayer and meditation. Some people feel the only way to get close to God is to empty their minds and disconnect from their physical bodies through repetitive prayers and chants.
This is not a thesis about the dangers of contemplative prayers. I am just using this as an example because it is a hot issue in Christian circles. There are many examples of Christians attempting to get closer to God. One example is legalism; another is the participation in a pilgrimage. There are many ways in which we attempt to bring ourselves closer to God.
But what I'm learning through reading this book and studying God's Word is that God is already close to me.
He is pursuing me.
Think about that. Think about every way you have tried to sabotage your own salvation by pursuing mindless whims. Think about your life, however long. My life has been a long road of 26 years. Some may not think it long, but when you take into account all the mountains and valleys (many of which I placed in my own way), it has been a long journey. Now think about God's pursuit of you. How often did you find God when you sought him? I will be honest and say, most the time I was seeking God, I couldn't see Him, because my sin was in my way. All the times that I found God, it was because He was there, waiting for me.
With that in mind, read over this selection of lyrics from Taylor Swift's "The Last Time" and imagine that they are God's words to us:
"I find myself at your door,
Just like all those times before,
I’m not sure how I got there,
All roads they lead me here.
I imagine you are home,
In your room, all alone,
And you open your eyes into mine,
And everything feels better.
I'm right before your eyes,
I’m breaking.
No thoughts, no reasons why,
Just you and me…
This is the last time I’m asking you this-
Put my name at the top of your list,
This is the last time I’m asking you why,
You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye…
You find yourself at my door,
Just like all those times before,
You wear your best apology,
But I was there to watch you leave.
And all the times I let you in,
Just for you to go again,
Disappear when you come back,
Everything is better."
It being a secular song, not all of it 'fits', but this section really gets me thinking about God's pursuant love for us. If you haven't heard this song, it's a duet. The male character pursues the girl, ends up at her door. The female character keeps letting him in and letting him hurt her. That's generally how heartbreak works.
But God plays both parts. Not only does he pursue us relentlessly, ending up at our door time and again (Rev 3:20), but He also waits patiently for us to come to Him time and again "wearing our best apology", and once we've gotten what we want we leave.
The patience by which God waits for us comes from the Greek word makrothumia. The word originates from makros (long, far, distant) and thumos (an outburst of passion). This type of patience driven by the passion of God Himself is enough for Him not only to pursue us, but to keep letting us return.
It is the patience of a father when his child leaves the nest, makes terrible decisions, squanders love and money, and returns...again.
It is the patience of a mother, a phone call away, waiting for the need to arise, waiting to swoop in to the rescue.
Something I've learned about parents is that they pursue their children. They will also watch them leave again and again.
God is the same.
Because that patience is of God. His love, mercy, and passion drives that patience. No matter how many times I land on His doorstep, I can rest assured that He spent the night on mine. No matter how many times I break His heart by walking away, I imagine Him one step behind me.
How can I not love a God like that?
Maybe the lyrics speak to me in this way because I've been reading a book called Pursued by a Relentless God in which the author, Shawn Brace, explores the grace of God in a new light--or at least a light I've never explored or realized.
An interesting trend in modern spirituality seems to be an inclination toward mysticism, in which Christians are seeking God through various forms of prayer and meditation. Some people feel the only way to get close to God is to empty their minds and disconnect from their physical bodies through repetitive prayers and chants.
This is not a thesis about the dangers of contemplative prayers. I am just using this as an example because it is a hot issue in Christian circles. There are many examples of Christians attempting to get closer to God. One example is legalism; another is the participation in a pilgrimage. There are many ways in which we attempt to bring ourselves closer to God.
But what I'm learning through reading this book and studying God's Word is that God is already close to me.
He is pursuing me.
Think about that. Think about every way you have tried to sabotage your own salvation by pursuing mindless whims. Think about your life, however long. My life has been a long road of 26 years. Some may not think it long, but when you take into account all the mountains and valleys (many of which I placed in my own way), it has been a long journey. Now think about God's pursuit of you. How often did you find God when you sought him? I will be honest and say, most the time I was seeking God, I couldn't see Him, because my sin was in my way. All the times that I found God, it was because He was there, waiting for me.
With that in mind, read over this selection of lyrics from Taylor Swift's "The Last Time" and imagine that they are God's words to us:
"I find myself at your door,
Just like all those times before,
I’m not sure how I got there,
All roads they lead me here.
I imagine you are home,
In your room, all alone,
And you open your eyes into mine,
And everything feels better.
I'm right before your eyes,
I’m breaking.
No thoughts, no reasons why,
Just you and me…
This is the last time I’m asking you this-
Put my name at the top of your list,
This is the last time I’m asking you why,
You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye…
You find yourself at my door,
Just like all those times before,
You wear your best apology,
But I was there to watch you leave.
And all the times I let you in,
Just for you to go again,
Disappear when you come back,
Everything is better."
It being a secular song, not all of it 'fits', but this section really gets me thinking about God's pursuant love for us. If you haven't heard this song, it's a duet. The male character pursues the girl, ends up at her door. The female character keeps letting him in and letting him hurt her. That's generally how heartbreak works.
But God plays both parts. Not only does he pursue us relentlessly, ending up at our door time and again (Rev 3:20), but He also waits patiently for us to come to Him time and again "wearing our best apology", and once we've gotten what we want we leave.
The patience by which God waits for us comes from the Greek word makrothumia. The word originates from makros (long, far, distant) and thumos (an outburst of passion). This type of patience driven by the passion of God Himself is enough for Him not only to pursue us, but to keep letting us return.
It is the patience of a father when his child leaves the nest, makes terrible decisions, squanders love and money, and returns...again.
It is the patience of a mother, a phone call away, waiting for the need to arise, waiting to swoop in to the rescue.
Something I've learned about parents is that they pursue their children. They will also watch them leave again and again.
God is the same.
Because that patience is of God. His love, mercy, and passion drives that patience. No matter how many times I land on His doorstep, I can rest assured that He spent the night on mine. No matter how many times I break His heart by walking away, I imagine Him one step behind me.
How can I not love a God like that?
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Jesus Prays
I have just stumbled upon a passage in the scripture of John in which we get a glimpse of Jesus in an intimate prayer with His Father. There is something about Jesus' prayer here that draws my attention. Of course Jesus prayed throughout His life and ministry on earth, of that I'm sure. So why does this draw me so?
Do you have someone you speak to regularly, draw encouragement and strength from, and to whom you confide in in an intimate capacity? I have three of these confidants--my cousin, Ally, my mom, and my husband. When I speak to these people I rarely invite someone else into the conversation, nor do I discuss the issue outside of our conversation.
Of course I believe Jesus prayed actively and often throughout His life and ministry on this earth, but I always imagined His praying as a sort of intimate conversation between father and son (much like my talks with my mom). So what makes this instance any different?
One of the most known prayers of Jesus to His Father, I think, would be in the garden of Gethsemane before His arrest in which he pleads "Oh, my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt" (Matthew 26) He prays that prayer 3 times while trying to take comfort in his Father's presence through prayer, as well as His disciples' support (but they keep falling asleep). This prayer is a desperate one between a Father and a Son. Jesus knows His Father holds all authority, but when I read this prayer I think of a time when I may have called my mom up, tears streaming down my face, trying to come up with the words to identify my pain. Jesus' prayer here is short and distressed, but His Father knows His heart. This is the kind of prayer I had always pictured Jesus praying, until I found this one in John.
According to the gospel of Matthew this is the last prayer Jesus prayed before His arrest. It isn't recorded in John, though. In John we get a different picture of Jesus. I tend to think the prayer of John 17 came before that of Matthew, because the disciples are with Jesus, awake. In this prayer, in public (or in the presence of the disciples), Jesus takes on a different ere, one of authority, in which he prays for Himself, His disciples, and His Church. I think what draws me to John 17 so is the passionate love Jesus shows through His prayer. Remember, this is one of Jesus' last prayers to His Father before His arrest. He could be asking right then, "let this cup pass," but instead He prays for glorification--not for Himself, but so that God can be glorified through Him; He prays for the disciples--that they may be one, made perfect, that they may have Jesus' joy, that they will be kept from evil, that they be sanctified, and that they may be with Him in glory, and that they may have the love in them that God has for them. Really, the fact that God's final words are of love for His people and His church blows me away. I shouldn't be surprised, though. God is love, and Jesus is God in the flesh. Also, it's not just any prayer--not just a conversation between a father and a son. Jesus is taking on an ere of authority in this prayer. He has the power to pray on behalf of these people He loves so much and He knows His Father has the power to see it through.
This is how I want to pray. I can pray for myself, sometimes even beg God to do things my way (and a lot of times I do), but I hope that when the time comes that I have little time on earth I spend my prayers to pray for those I love. Jesus spent verse after verse in John 17 praying for others. He prayed a short prayer of personal anguish and need in Matthew, but the majority of His words were for others.
I have to make it a personal goal to remember this. When I pray I don't want it to be repetitive requests for myself (although sometimes I do need to pray for myself), but prayers for others. From talking to my mom about her prayer life and just observing how she prays I have come to realize that prayers are more powerful when you're praying for others. I know I personally want to have a powerful prayer life, so that I can have those intimate, personal moments with God as well as interceding on behalf of others.
Do you have someone you speak to regularly, draw encouragement and strength from, and to whom you confide in in an intimate capacity? I have three of these confidants--my cousin, Ally, my mom, and my husband. When I speak to these people I rarely invite someone else into the conversation, nor do I discuss the issue outside of our conversation.
Of course I believe Jesus prayed actively and often throughout His life and ministry on this earth, but I always imagined His praying as a sort of intimate conversation between father and son (much like my talks with my mom). So what makes this instance any different?
One of the most known prayers of Jesus to His Father, I think, would be in the garden of Gethsemane before His arrest in which he pleads "Oh, my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt" (Matthew 26) He prays that prayer 3 times while trying to take comfort in his Father's presence through prayer, as well as His disciples' support (but they keep falling asleep). This prayer is a desperate one between a Father and a Son. Jesus knows His Father holds all authority, but when I read this prayer I think of a time when I may have called my mom up, tears streaming down my face, trying to come up with the words to identify my pain. Jesus' prayer here is short and distressed, but His Father knows His heart. This is the kind of prayer I had always pictured Jesus praying, until I found this one in John.
According to the gospel of Matthew this is the last prayer Jesus prayed before His arrest. It isn't recorded in John, though. In John we get a different picture of Jesus. I tend to think the prayer of John 17 came before that of Matthew, because the disciples are with Jesus, awake. In this prayer, in public (or in the presence of the disciples), Jesus takes on a different ere, one of authority, in which he prays for Himself, His disciples, and His Church. I think what draws me to John 17 so is the passionate love Jesus shows through His prayer. Remember, this is one of Jesus' last prayers to His Father before His arrest. He could be asking right then, "let this cup pass," but instead He prays for glorification--not for Himself, but so that God can be glorified through Him; He prays for the disciples--that they may be one, made perfect, that they may have Jesus' joy, that they will be kept from evil, that they be sanctified, and that they may be with Him in glory, and that they may have the love in them that God has for them. Really, the fact that God's final words are of love for His people and His church blows me away. I shouldn't be surprised, though. God is love, and Jesus is God in the flesh. Also, it's not just any prayer--not just a conversation between a father and a son. Jesus is taking on an ere of authority in this prayer. He has the power to pray on behalf of these people He loves so much and He knows His Father has the power to see it through.
This is how I want to pray. I can pray for myself, sometimes even beg God to do things my way (and a lot of times I do), but I hope that when the time comes that I have little time on earth I spend my prayers to pray for those I love. Jesus spent verse after verse in John 17 praying for others. He prayed a short prayer of personal anguish and need in Matthew, but the majority of His words were for others.
I have to make it a personal goal to remember this. When I pray I don't want it to be repetitive requests for myself (although sometimes I do need to pray for myself), but prayers for others. From talking to my mom about her prayer life and just observing how she prays I have come to realize that prayers are more powerful when you're praying for others. I know I personally want to have a powerful prayer life, so that I can have those intimate, personal moments with God as well as interceding on behalf of others.
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Hi. My Name Is Rachel...
It's true what they say about men and women. Maybe men aren't from Mars, and women aren't from Venus (although it makes for a close shave), but the two counterparts of humanity are so different they may as well be on different sides of the universe!
For instance, something Morrel says to me, or something I say to him may be the same word or phrase, but we understand it completely opposite. I'm not one to steal, so I won't. I do very much like a book called Love & Respect, though, so I will just paraphrase a great example.
He says: " I have nothing to wear!" (jerking a hanger off the closet rod). What he's really saying: "You never do any laundry!"
I say: "I have nothing to wear!" (throwing clothes into the floor from the dresser). What I really mean: "I'm so fat nothing fits!"
Bottom line is we speak a different language, women and men. Something to do with the chromosomes that make us who we are also makes us understand things in a certain way. This is an area I have had to grow in lately. I'd say in the last 2 years God has opened my eyes to my failures as a wife, and strengthened me enough to implement change. It is important to make a change when you realize you can do better.
"Hi. My name is Rachel, and I disrespect my husband." There, I said it. The first step to fixing a problem is admitting you have one. Notice I didn't say "I do not respect my husband". The fact is that I do respect him--very much. That doesn't change the fact that I very often disrespect him. By the words I say, the way I say them, the gestures I make, and the general things I do I can paint a shade of harmony in my marriage, or I can paint the red of anger. And when Papa ain't happy, ain't nobody happy (yea, that works both ways as well).
It is something that men feel but rarely say: I NEED RESPECT!
It's something women feel, but rarely say: I RESPECT YOU!
I decided that it was time to tell my husband that I respect him. It's funny that when I started thinking about respect and how I respect him I was perplexed, because I knew I did respect him, but I didn't rightly know for what. So I used a white board we have on our refrigerator and started writing him notes everyday or every other day--reasons why I respect him. It was something he did that day, or maybe around that time, or something big that just blew me away. It's funny, the more I thought about it, the more reasons I came up with to respect my husband. Over time I realized that there was very little reason to disrespect him, and that even the slightest disrespect was unloving.
Unloving.
Now there's a term a woman can understand. I am genetically made up to nurture and love everyone, but by showing this disrespect for my husband, I was failing to show him love. That is a big pill to swallow for a wife. You never want to realize that you aren't loving toward your husband. Because we know how it feels to be treated "unloving", and it hurts. The fact of the matter is, men need to feel respected and women need to feel loved.
Paul knew this fact almost 2000 years ago when he wrote in a letter to the Ephesians: "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband" (5:33).
I pray every marriage can be strengthened by this realization, that wives' eyes will be opened to this revelation that has been available to us all for centuries in scripture that we have failed to read. Just think about how much you need to feel loved. That is how much your husband needs to feel respected.
For instance, something Morrel says to me, or something I say to him may be the same word or phrase, but we understand it completely opposite. I'm not one to steal, so I won't. I do very much like a book called Love & Respect, though, so I will just paraphrase a great example.
He says: " I have nothing to wear!" (jerking a hanger off the closet rod). What he's really saying: "You never do any laundry!"
I say: "I have nothing to wear!" (throwing clothes into the floor from the dresser). What I really mean: "I'm so fat nothing fits!"
Bottom line is we speak a different language, women and men. Something to do with the chromosomes that make us who we are also makes us understand things in a certain way. This is an area I have had to grow in lately. I'd say in the last 2 years God has opened my eyes to my failures as a wife, and strengthened me enough to implement change. It is important to make a change when you realize you can do better.
"Hi. My name is Rachel, and I disrespect my husband." There, I said it. The first step to fixing a problem is admitting you have one. Notice I didn't say "I do not respect my husband". The fact is that I do respect him--very much. That doesn't change the fact that I very often disrespect him. By the words I say, the way I say them, the gestures I make, and the general things I do I can paint a shade of harmony in my marriage, or I can paint the red of anger. And when Papa ain't happy, ain't nobody happy (yea, that works both ways as well).
It is something that men feel but rarely say: I NEED RESPECT!
It's something women feel, but rarely say: I RESPECT YOU!
I decided that it was time to tell my husband that I respect him. It's funny that when I started thinking about respect and how I respect him I was perplexed, because I knew I did respect him, but I didn't rightly know for what. So I used a white board we have on our refrigerator and started writing him notes everyday or every other day--reasons why I respect him. It was something he did that day, or maybe around that time, or something big that just blew me away. It's funny, the more I thought about it, the more reasons I came up with to respect my husband. Over time I realized that there was very little reason to disrespect him, and that even the slightest disrespect was unloving.
Unloving.
Now there's a term a woman can understand. I am genetically made up to nurture and love everyone, but by showing this disrespect for my husband, I was failing to show him love. That is a big pill to swallow for a wife. You never want to realize that you aren't loving toward your husband. Because we know how it feels to be treated "unloving", and it hurts. The fact of the matter is, men need to feel respected and women need to feel loved.
Paul knew this fact almost 2000 years ago when he wrote in a letter to the Ephesians: "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband" (5:33).
I pray every marriage can be strengthened by this realization, that wives' eyes will be opened to this revelation that has been available to us all for centuries in scripture that we have failed to read. Just think about how much you need to feel loved. That is how much your husband needs to feel respected.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Faith and Politics (oxymoron?)
I'm just going to do what you're not supposed to do and write a blog about politics so close to a presidential election day.
I've been thinking a lot about this because like any responsible citizen I feel the duty to vote--especially every four years for the presidential election. I may not get to the polls every other year, but like many Americans, I make a point to get there to cast the presidential vote.
It's kind of ironic, really. It matters to me who is leading the country, so I vote. Yet, it doesn't matter enough to me to keep track of the major (and minor) issues throughout the years in between, unless the issue directly affects me. So then it comes to about August 2012, and I'm getting bombarded with articles, news outlets, facebook and twitter feeds swinging this way or that, DEBATES, propaganda, documentaries, etcetera, etcetera.
The problem is sometimes I find myself so far removed from an issue that I can't properly pick a side until I do some digging.
This isn't the only area that I have this problem.
In my own personal spiritual life I have chosen the leader. Every day I am faced with the decision--Who do I follow? Who gets my vote?
I choose God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit.
It is an important decision to make, right? So I have to make it. I can't just bide my time on the fence. I have to pick one or the other. Someone will be leading, so if I don't choose, someone will.
So, I pick. God.
He will guide me, help me do the right thing, protect me from ultimate harm, bless me in various ways He promised, so I get a gold star for decision-making.
I put my gold star sticker on the back of my hand and go on with my life. Mostly my Bible sits quietly, closed, and I don't bother myself with the details (kind of like the political issues I try to ignore). Oh, sometimes something lands in my lap. A good book. A popular Bible study. So I study the prescribed ideal, exactly what the author wants me to study (kind of like the right-wing slant of FOX news telling the stories they want me to hear exactly how they want me to hear it).
It's interesting that during this time in between choosing the leaders in my life (both spiritually and politically), I end up letting a lot of people lead me around by the ear, leaving me unable to form my own opinions about the real issues.
This is a really complex issue now that I'm trying to put it into words. Plain and simple, I need to take charge of my life--my spiritual life and my political life, as well as every other facet of my life.
It's not just my problem though! I see people all the time who get something in the mail from a religious organization, read through it, and then adhere to the prescribed doctrine therein.
I see people on my facebook and twitter feeds that see a movie or a news story, a doctored photograph or audio recording of a candidate or politician and prescribe to the doctrine therein.
The truth is I am proud to be an American citizen, and I need to also be a proud voter and active in the issues that make America America.
I am also and foremost a proud Christian, and I need to also be a proud disciple, leader, and Christian example--not just when a religious debate comes up on facebook--but all the time.
Form my own opinions.
Learn my own viewpoint.
Study study study.
Then maybe I can teach someone else something too.
I've been thinking a lot about this because like any responsible citizen I feel the duty to vote--especially every four years for the presidential election. I may not get to the polls every other year, but like many Americans, I make a point to get there to cast the presidential vote.
It's kind of ironic, really. It matters to me who is leading the country, so I vote. Yet, it doesn't matter enough to me to keep track of the major (and minor) issues throughout the years in between, unless the issue directly affects me. So then it comes to about August 2012, and I'm getting bombarded with articles, news outlets, facebook and twitter feeds swinging this way or that, DEBATES, propaganda, documentaries, etcetera, etcetera.
The problem is sometimes I find myself so far removed from an issue that I can't properly pick a side until I do some digging.
This isn't the only area that I have this problem.
In my own personal spiritual life I have chosen the leader. Every day I am faced with the decision--Who do I follow? Who gets my vote?
I choose God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit.
It is an important decision to make, right? So I have to make it. I can't just bide my time on the fence. I have to pick one or the other. Someone will be leading, so if I don't choose, someone will.
So, I pick. God.
He will guide me, help me do the right thing, protect me from ultimate harm, bless me in various ways He promised, so I get a gold star for decision-making.
I put my gold star sticker on the back of my hand and go on with my life. Mostly my Bible sits quietly, closed, and I don't bother myself with the details (kind of like the political issues I try to ignore). Oh, sometimes something lands in my lap. A good book. A popular Bible study. So I study the prescribed ideal, exactly what the author wants me to study (kind of like the right-wing slant of FOX news telling the stories they want me to hear exactly how they want me to hear it).
It's interesting that during this time in between choosing the leaders in my life (both spiritually and politically), I end up letting a lot of people lead me around by the ear, leaving me unable to form my own opinions about the real issues.
This is a really complex issue now that I'm trying to put it into words. Plain and simple, I need to take charge of my life--my spiritual life and my political life, as well as every other facet of my life.
It's not just my problem though! I see people all the time who get something in the mail from a religious organization, read through it, and then adhere to the prescribed doctrine therein.
I see people on my facebook and twitter feeds that see a movie or a news story, a doctored photograph or audio recording of a candidate or politician and prescribe to the doctrine therein.
The truth is I am proud to be an American citizen, and I need to also be a proud voter and active in the issues that make America America.
I am also and foremost a proud Christian, and I need to also be a proud disciple, leader, and Christian example--not just when a religious debate comes up on facebook--but all the time.
Form my own opinions.
Learn my own viewpoint.
Study study study.
Then maybe I can teach someone else something too.
Monday, September 3, 2012
Where Have All the Men Gone?
I read an article today that mentioned a quote by Australian activist Irina Dunn in which she quips: "A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle." Unfortunately this particular saying has become a slogan or battle cry for women's liberation (I use this term with a cringe) in Australia and in other places in the world. Sitting here on my couch in the quiet of the morning I wonder if these women really listen to what it is they're saying. Obviously by definition we don't need anyone--at least not in a human capacity. I don't need my husband anymore than a fish needs a bicycle. I do, however, need him as much as a fish needs another fish to procreate. When my two boys play and giggle, looking up at me with their Daddy's eyes, I have a hard time imagining life without them. And yes, I needed him for the act of love that created them.
I don't think the issue we as women have is with men. I have been reading a book by Lisa Bevere called Fight Like a Girl in which she investigates the gender confusion of women today. She asserts that women don't like women, don't like being women, and don't like men simply because they are blessed to not be women! I am not too far in the reading, but I am loving it, because I have never realized the complete upheaval women are in as a societal whole, as individual persons, and as mothers of a race.
Can we continue to mother a race without men to father them? Some say, yes. There is enough frozen sperm to keep the race alive if all the men were to drop dead at this instant. There are enough women to take care of a race of young boys and girls. After all, who needs the men around to teach them to play in dirt and burp, right? Why do we need men to teach our boys to be boys? If we women were left to the child-rearing as many would hope, we would have armies of young boys sweeping and cooking, carrying laundry baskets, and taking out the trash. Our little girls would be carrying baby dolls around on their hips, reading, learning to play piano and sing, and learning how to be...wives?
Is it possible that we as women are trapped in a societal role of womanhood that we don't even like, and we wish something better for our own daughters, yet we advocate this role given us? I don't need a man and neither does any woman that may be reading this. I can't imagine a woman that likes to be alone, though. It's interesting that even though we don't need men, we still date them, marry them, or live with them, have babies with them, and love them--all the while reminding them that we don't need them. This article I read today explained the problem that exists with this mindset and arrangement. If we as women let men "off the hook" when it comes to earning money, raising children, being the leader of the home, what will happen?
They will be happy to oblige! Fifty years ago men would not be caught dead in their "man cave" with a video game controller in one hand and a beer in the other in the middle of the day, unshaven and unkempt. The men got up with the sun, donned their respective uniforms, and earned an honest wage, came home and relaxed, spent time with children, taught their boys to build things, fix things, fear dad, and fear God. Fifty years ago they didn't have women standing an arm's reach away saying "you don't have to, just let me".
Many women today let the men "off the hook" and then expect them to pick up the slack out of consideration for us. Why would they do that? If I tell my husband that I want to keep the house, and then silently expect him to help with dishes after dinner, we are both going to be disappointed. I will be disappointed while doing dishes every night, and he will be disappointed because of the silent treatment he gets every night.
I don't think I've ever thought of the male gender role much. Since James Standish got me thinking about it today after reading his article "Filling the Father Gap" I have realized more than women need men, men actually need women in a more urgent capacity than we realize. Think about it, in Genesis 2, when God created Adam, He said "'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him'...And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said; 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man'...Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (verses 18, 21-24).
As I read these verses my attention is drawn to the fact that Adam was created first and God--the Almighty and Magnificent Creator of all things--saw that it wasn't good for him to be alone. It sounds like to me that God saw a need, and fulfilled it for Adam. Adam needed someone to keep him company, and God created the perfect companion for him. He didn't create Eve out of dirt as He did Adam. He instead took a rib from Adam, making Eve part of him. Without Eve, Adam was not whole, was he? You could even say that Adam needed Eve, perhaps in the same way I think men still need women. It is this deep need that is causing the turmoil in gender roles today. Women are pushing the men away, saying "we don't need you", when it's the men that need the women. Without the women, men have little purpose. God has commanded the men to leave their mothers and fathers and be joined with a wife. God created this codependency in Eden, and I believe it still exists. When we STEAL the men's role they are lost, and end up wearing sweat pants in a basement with an X Box and a bag of chips. We steal their Biblical manhood, and then we're surprised when we have to toil away at a job to make ends meet, clean up after everyone in the house, make the parent/teacher conferences, take care of the kids, and take care of bills. Where have the men gone?
It seems the men are free and the women are in tears, juggling cinder blocks with arms outstretched in all directions wondering where the men went. If we truly didn't need men, we would be able to do it all, but we can't. By limiting men's role in our homes and lives we end up limiting ourselves. Women have a nature altogether different than men and the two compliment each other.
I'm not sure how or when women will become comfortable in their own skin and role, but I hope I raise young men that can see women for their splendor and grace, and never sacrifice their own roles for the sake of fitting into a societal mold. When it seems likes it's too late to fix our own generation we can turn to teaching our own children a better way--but this too requires the mother and the father.
I don't think the issue we as women have is with men. I have been reading a book by Lisa Bevere called Fight Like a Girl in which she investigates the gender confusion of women today. She asserts that women don't like women, don't like being women, and don't like men simply because they are blessed to not be women! I am not too far in the reading, but I am loving it, because I have never realized the complete upheaval women are in as a societal whole, as individual persons, and as mothers of a race.
Can we continue to mother a race without men to father them? Some say, yes. There is enough frozen sperm to keep the race alive if all the men were to drop dead at this instant. There are enough women to take care of a race of young boys and girls. After all, who needs the men around to teach them to play in dirt and burp, right? Why do we need men to teach our boys to be boys? If we women were left to the child-rearing as many would hope, we would have armies of young boys sweeping and cooking, carrying laundry baskets, and taking out the trash. Our little girls would be carrying baby dolls around on their hips, reading, learning to play piano and sing, and learning how to be...wives?
Is it possible that we as women are trapped in a societal role of womanhood that we don't even like, and we wish something better for our own daughters, yet we advocate this role given us? I don't need a man and neither does any woman that may be reading this. I can't imagine a woman that likes to be alone, though. It's interesting that even though we don't need men, we still date them, marry them, or live with them, have babies with them, and love them--all the while reminding them that we don't need them. This article I read today explained the problem that exists with this mindset and arrangement. If we as women let men "off the hook" when it comes to earning money, raising children, being the leader of the home, what will happen?
They will be happy to oblige! Fifty years ago men would not be caught dead in their "man cave" with a video game controller in one hand and a beer in the other in the middle of the day, unshaven and unkempt. The men got up with the sun, donned their respective uniforms, and earned an honest wage, came home and relaxed, spent time with children, taught their boys to build things, fix things, fear dad, and fear God. Fifty years ago they didn't have women standing an arm's reach away saying "you don't have to, just let me".
Many women today let the men "off the hook" and then expect them to pick up the slack out of consideration for us. Why would they do that? If I tell my husband that I want to keep the house, and then silently expect him to help with dishes after dinner, we are both going to be disappointed. I will be disappointed while doing dishes every night, and he will be disappointed because of the silent treatment he gets every night.
I don't think I've ever thought of the male gender role much. Since James Standish got me thinking about it today after reading his article "Filling the Father Gap" I have realized more than women need men, men actually need women in a more urgent capacity than we realize. Think about it, in Genesis 2, when God created Adam, He said "'It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him'...And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said; 'This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man'...Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh" (verses 18, 21-24).
As I read these verses my attention is drawn to the fact that Adam was created first and God--the Almighty and Magnificent Creator of all things--saw that it wasn't good for him to be alone. It sounds like to me that God saw a need, and fulfilled it for Adam. Adam needed someone to keep him company, and God created the perfect companion for him. He didn't create Eve out of dirt as He did Adam. He instead took a rib from Adam, making Eve part of him. Without Eve, Adam was not whole, was he? You could even say that Adam needed Eve, perhaps in the same way I think men still need women. It is this deep need that is causing the turmoil in gender roles today. Women are pushing the men away, saying "we don't need you", when it's the men that need the women. Without the women, men have little purpose. God has commanded the men to leave their mothers and fathers and be joined with a wife. God created this codependency in Eden, and I believe it still exists. When we STEAL the men's role they are lost, and end up wearing sweat pants in a basement with an X Box and a bag of chips. We steal their Biblical manhood, and then we're surprised when we have to toil away at a job to make ends meet, clean up after everyone in the house, make the parent/teacher conferences, take care of the kids, and take care of bills. Where have the men gone?
It seems the men are free and the women are in tears, juggling cinder blocks with arms outstretched in all directions wondering where the men went. If we truly didn't need men, we would be able to do it all, but we can't. By limiting men's role in our homes and lives we end up limiting ourselves. Women have a nature altogether different than men and the two compliment each other.
I'm not sure how or when women will become comfortable in their own skin and role, but I hope I raise young men that can see women for their splendor and grace, and never sacrifice their own roles for the sake of fitting into a societal mold. When it seems likes it's too late to fix our own generation we can turn to teaching our own children a better way--but this too requires the mother and the father.
Tuesday, May 29, 2012
Memorial Day
So today we got up and ready early and went to the National Cemetery in Mounds City, Illinois to visit Morrel's grandpa's grave. He was a WW II vet and my husband's hero--the reason he joined the service--and I'm glad we finally went to his grave sight. It was also nice to see all the flags waving high, and the flags placed at each grave, the several families there to pay their respects, and the guy (who I assume is a volunteer) helping people find graves, giving out free water, and shuttling people to graves all while enduring 95 degree weather (at least that's what it was at 10 am). It takes people like that to make something as sad as visiting a cemetery a little better, because you realize there are other people who care about that side of Memorial Day.
We all know what Memorial Day has come to mean, yes? Barbeques, backyard pools, rope swings into lakes or maybe jet skis, beer and wine coolers (for some), or just spending time with family. But why do we even have this holiday off? There are several stories as to how it started. They say organized groups of women began placing wreaths of flowers on the graves of fallen soldiers as early as the Civil War. And there are several states that would like to take credit for the start of the holiday. The point is, though, that the holiday was started because people had a common interest, a need to fulfill, and it may have taken a day off to accomplish it. For instance, when I was younger I remember my grandma would buy arrangements and visit the graves of my uncle and grandpa every year on Memorial Day. Families all over still do this I think. But between the hotdogs and hamburgers the view has been clouded. It's almost like America needed a holiday to let them know when summer starts and Memorial Day was at a prime location on the calendar. Pools don't open until Memorial Day. The fashion world says women can't wear black after Memorial Day. Retailers say we need to save 40 % at the Memorial Day sales. On and on it goes.
I am not condemning. For years all Memorial Day has meant to me is that it's the weekend our family goes to the boat races and end up with a sunburn on Tuesday. I think that has changed for me though. Because although we did get together with family and barbeque today, we also got to visit an extraordinary grave in a cemetery filled with hundreds of identical stones. It is extraordinary because the guy that did a lot of form the man my husband grew into has been laid to rest there. I am one who believes in the Biblical death, meaning when someone dies they rest (sleep) here on earth until Christ returns, but there is something to be said for visiting the dead in respect, and other gestures, like putting up flags at banks, and in cemeteries for the holiday weekend. This year I realized that this is something I want to teach my children and for them to remember. Memorial Day is not just the doorway to summer. It was started and observed to remember those who have lost their lives in combat for this country. Shouldn't we do our best to remember them--whether or not we agree with whatever war we are currently involved in, whether or not they we active duty, National Guard, or reserve, whether they were Army, Navy, or Air Force. These guys died for something other than themselves, for something they believed in, whether or not you do. It makes me proud to live in this country where we have such a holiday. So I hope people continue to remember the real reason behind it.
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